Day Thirty Six

Oh God spare me from this misery and suffering. A suffering no one will be able to know except me and you! I wouldnt even wanna think about tomorrow, for i dread it to come! But always the first ray of the morning lights shattled dat thought! why!! why!! Why cant I chose the path i wanna take? I'm so sick n tired of this reality, i'm suffocating with every breath i take in; juz take it tat I dont belong here, I came to the wrong plane. all i want to do is to leave everything and go away. dont even think abt being able to find me, i supposed they wont care either. why dont end of days come sooner? rather be freezed to death then to drown or get over heated n BBQed!

how i miss stars watching nights, clouds watching days, my literature
lessons, my choir practices, my art lessons, how i miss the wind mill farm n sussie, aunt joan and uncle milton! how i miss the sight and smell of the wild flowers of summer! how i miss the old 15 yr old me!

nothing but a fading memory... in dusty brains.

offically sinking back into depression. althought i dont sound like it or look like it. it's begining to consume me inside out.
they say a woman's mind is more complicating than fixing a robot! it's juz complicated y i'm sinking down again.

better publish this if not mar n clara will nv remember, incase anything happened, n cant find records of my dna, i left samples of it in my diary, inside the drawer of the taller cabinard in my room. thanks!

[sometimes being someone who is as bright as a star isnt a good thing, because a star is so far away till it's like outta reach] -quote


SUMMER SNOW (Sissel)
lt's summer snow in the deep blue sea
I try to touch, but it fades away
It must be a dream I will never get
Just like my love that's crying for you

If there were something not to change forever
We could feel it deep in our heart
Today is over with a million tears
Still everyone has a wish to live

Oh, I do believe everlasting love
And destiny to meet you again
I feel a pain I can hardly stand
All I can do is loving you

It's summer snow in deep blue sea
I try to touch, but it fades away
It must be a dream I will never get
Just like my love that's crying for you



I dont like the lyrics at this moment, other then dat , i like the dat song